Fran, we have a very similar philosophy, and I really like the concept of compressed morbidity. That’s what I want to feel good nearly to the end, and then take a quick dive down the tube.

My biggest changes in the last couple of month are getting more (enough) sleep and reducing my stress, or more precisely, how I respond to potentially stressful situations.

I’m also smiling more…

What Gene Burnett says about ‘the ideal death’ his doctor described reminds me of something I read a couple of years ago and blogged about: Dr. Andrew Weil says he considers the fixation on anti-aging and life extension drugs to be a distraction from the important goal of healthy aging.

He says we should concentrate on making positive lifestyle choices – eating better, exercising more, getting enough sleep, even improving our mental state so that we can enjoy not just a longer life but a healthier one.

Such a life would end in due course, but the decline would be rapid. The scientific term for this is compression of morbidity, literally squeezing the period of disability and decline at the end of life into as short a period as possible … as Gene’s doctor also said!

I like that and I want to believe that the boomers will make those kind of choices as they go into very old age … because they’re often involved in the care of their very old parents who seem to have lived with the belief that debilitating illnesse were a natural consequence of old age … whereas for most of these boomers 60 is the new forties and they’ll try to keep that edge!

Everything in moderation with a positive outlook and love in our heart is
my philosophy!

Fran 🙂

Mark, thanks for stopping by.

It’s easy for people to think about the short-term pleasure of bad habits — while ignoring the long-term pain.

I happened upon your site today & I am glad I did.

The most important part of our lives is life itself, which is so hard to think about. I think that the reason that people do not take care of themselves is simply that we have a very hard time imagining not being alive. And, it is easy to think something like “if I ate 6 pounds of icecream yesterday and am still alive, then why worry?”

Have a great day!
.-= mark@motivation´s last blog ..When Is Doing Something Well Not Enough? Now. =-.

Eric, I totally agree about the importance of happiness. Like you, I’d rather be fully alive and live for only a short time than have a long but bitter life.

My plan is to stay happy and healthy for a long, long time. But we never know for certain about our health…

Gene, thanks for the thoughtful and informative comment.

I also know people who have lots of reasons for why it’s too difficult to make a change — say in their diet or amount they exercise — and for many I can see that they are more comfortable with their pain than they are in doing something new that could get rid of or at least alleviate much of that pain.

I’ve never used alcohol or tobacco to any significant extent, and I’ve nearly always kept my weight under control.

Over the last few years I’ve really improved my diet in terms of eating lots of fresh vegetables, whole grains, and modest quantity of lean meats.

But I’ve also started eating a few sweets. And I accept that and just ask myself when sweets are an option: “Does my body really want this?” Often the answer is no, but when it’s yes, I partake and enjoy.

There is only one thing missing from this equation–happiness. You need to be happy with your life, your circumstances, your work, your play, your goals, your friends and loved ones. I would rather have a short but happy life than a protracted life without joy. Happiness and joy can be achieved by simply appreciating that you are alive and live in a wonderful world. So, do what you want to do right now. Live life to the fullest. Make the few years you walk this earth worthwhile to you and to others who know you.

It’s not really that hard but still many people will not do it. There can be all kinds of internal obstacles to making the fundamental inner choice to take care of oneself. I used to be really resistant to taking care of myself and now I’m much less so. How that change came about, I have no idea. Probably several small shifts in focus, small decisions, I’m not sure. It is a total mystery to me.

It seems like the whole self-help world is based on the premise that people want to live better, they just need help, or better techniques, or knowledge, or “coaching”, or encouragement, or support, or whatever New Age breakthrough has just occurred. But I’ve met many people who seem determined, no matter what they say or “try”, to stay unwell. I don’t know how to affect this layer in people or even in myself. The place where these internal decisions, if we can even call them that, get made. All I think that I can “do” is to listen to my body and it’s various thoughts and feelings and be on the lookout for that “right” or “wrong” feeling that tells me I need to move in one direction or another. Doing my best to maintain a more neutral open mind and body seems to allow the “decisions” or the feelings that block those decisions to flow better and become manifest. What hasn’t worked at all are various willful “campaigns” to improve my health or outlook. They always collapse I think, because they come from my head and are then inflicted on my body.

I think that if someone is moving in the direction of self care, if they are bailing out their boat so to speak, then “help” of all kinds, including the suggestions of my doctor friend and this blog, can be useful and productive. But if someone hasn’t really made that internal decision, or is just whining that their boat is sinking, or is collecting stories that begin “I tried (insert healing modality here)…”, then I don’t think all the coaching and self-help books in the world will help.

But again, what brings a person to that choice point is a complete mystery to me. The self-help world would have me believe it’s a product of will or “intention” but I think it’s just grace. The most I can “will” is a readiness to run with it if it shows up…. I change when it’s time to change. It just feels right to do things differently. When I force change, I don’t change. When I accept how I am, whatever that is, things start to move. Weird huh? What I try to change doesn’t. What I let be and accept consciously, starts to change.

Good post John! Keep up the great work. GB